Robber State

I was going on my Raya rounds. And noticed that every housing area in KL and its outskirts and maybe even elsewhere is now like an Iraqi city US army checkpoint. Guards, gates, barriers, interrogation. I wish my residence guards were like the Gestapo/trigger-happy US army guys too, but depa pakai pas tangan. Angkat tangan, Chin Peng, Bentong Kali pun boleh pas. Apa lagi Indon2 naik motor. And the night guard sleeps. Coz he works two jobs. He leaves the barrier open and drools away.

I also read the paper today. A Mat Salleh was SHOT trying to save a 70 year old lady from snatch thieves. SHOT! They have guns now. An A student smashed her head in front of her mum, was comatose for a week, and died. Tak sempat ambik SPM. Because of snatch thieves.

Remember the two pregnant women who died earlier? And many others? My sister was also a victim. My husband and his two friends were ambushed at parang point by ice-maddened rempits, 200 metres from the Wangsa Link police station. Police tidur kot. Atau sama2 takut. Ah Longs terrorise two neighbors of mine, threatening our guards and residents and properties (tried to burn one house, or at least the trees...police said "aiyoyo...we also velly the scary one of these Al Longs!") Almost everyone we know is a victim of burglary. Or snatch thieves or rempit terrorists. THEY should be sent to Guantanamo. Leave it open for them.

I have a question.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THE IGP, HOME MINISTER AND PRIME MINISTER DOING ABOUT IT?

Meatloaf is yummy

Ramadhan leaves us...

And me
in tears...
for all that was not done
and all that was in vain
may I get another chance
next year...

To all my dear Muslims friends...old and new
Selamat hari Raya
Maaf zahir batin

Taqabbal Allahu minna wa minkum wa kullu ‘aamin wa antum bikhayr (May
Allah accept it from us and you and may you be well every year). Ameen

Meme: Save Yvonne's Sight

What if you or any of your loved ones is afflicted with neurofibromatosis type II and his/her sight has been severely affected? Would you have written a book about the condition to help raise funds for the very expensive surgery. Well, someone has done just that, not for another but for herself.




Yvonne Foong, 22, has neurofibromatosis type II, which has severely affected her sight and hearing due to tumours in the brain and spine. She is scheduled for an operation between 1 and 4 December 2009. The cost of surgery is USD44,000 or RM154,770, and the cost of staying in hospital for two weeks is USD915 or RM3219.
She has raised about RM10,000 of this and is hoping to raise the rest by republishing her book I'm Not Sick; I'm Just a Bit Unwell in English and Chinese. The books are now available in Malaysian bookshops and from her web site store. She is also selling T-shirts at bazaars and via her web site store. You can read about her surgery and donate to her fund here.

You can also help by sending on this meme. If you do, please follow these meme rules:

1. Create a blog entry titled "Meme: Save Yvonne's Sight"
2. List three things you love to see. Add in the picture of Yvonne's book cover. The URL is http://www.yvonnefoong.com/images/banner/my-story.jpg
3. End with the line, "Yvonne Foong is in danger of losing her eyesight thanks to neurofibromatosis (NF). Please find out how you can help her by visiting her blog at http://www.yvonnefoong.com.
4. Tag 5 blog friends. Be sure to copy the rules, OK?
5. If you have a Facebook account, please check out Ellen's new invention, a "feme" pronounced FEEM, a meme designed for Facebook here. And if you want to blog about NF, that would be great too!

Three things I love to see :

1. My children
2. The blue sky
3. The rain

Zendra has tagged me for the Save Yvonne's Sight Meme.

Bloggers I'm tagging are:

Tok Senek of Dust in the Wind
Nadzrin of Silat Melayu the Blog
Mary Kate of La Vie Est Belle
Shah of Cakapaje
Lynn of Combat Loaded and Mission Ready

"Yvonne Foong is in danger of losing her eyesight thanks to neurofibromatosis (NF). Please find out how you can help her by visiting her blog at http://www.yvonnefoong.com."


In fact if anyone else out there would like to meme or feme this - please feel free.
LET'S DO WHATEVER WE CAN TO HELP YVONNE.

Hari Raya: Sayu atau Gembira?

Dear friends,

so sorry if I haven't been able to reply to your comments, a bit kelam-kabut with unfinished work!

Hari Raya Bukan Hari Sedih

Disiarkan pada Sep 13, 2009 dalam kategori Dakwah |

oleh: Dr. Mohd Asri bin Zainul Abidin

Masyarakat melayu kita sering mengaitkan hariraya dengan hari kesedihan. Perkara ini diransang tambah oleh media kita. Apabila tiba hariraya, takbir raya ala melayu berirama sedih, alunan melodinya mendayu dan mengundang airmata, drama dan cerita dalam media akan dikaitkan dengan kisah-kisah sedih dan pilu, puisi dan lagu juga begitu. Apakah hariraya dalam Islam hari sedih, atau hari kemenangan dan kegembiraan?

Terlebih dahulu kita hendaklah tahu bahawa hari raya dalam Islam bukan sekadar tradisi atau cetusan idea mana-mana pihak, ia adalah syariat yang diturunkan oleh Allah dan ada hukum-hakamnya yang tersendiri. Di samping ia adalah hari yang Allah peruntukkan untuk kaum muslimin membesarkan Allah, kemenangan dan kegembiraan.

Read more here

Sakinah

I desire not

Love of another
Love of this life
Love for living

Pure, unadulterated Joy
nor
Fleeting Happiness,

Burning Passion
nor
Wealth,

Excitement
nor
Adventure,

Fame
nor
Victory,

Beauty
nor
Adornment


I seek only
as-sakinah
tranquility

the mother of all emotions.

The elusive Treasure

Sakinah
Islam is the religion of peace. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) used to say and write in his letters to the chiefs of tribes in his time: "Aslim Taslam (Accept Islam and find peace.)"

Islam places great emphasis on inner peace. In the Qur'an, it is called Sakinah (inner calm and tranquility), Tuma'ninah (comfort of the heart, satisfaction and contentment) Sharh As-Sadr (understanding, openness of the chest, restfulness). Believers receive these gifts from Allah Almighty. In the most difficult situations, Allah mentions that He bestowed inner peace on the believers

Tuma'ninah
Regarding the Battle of Badr, Allah says: (Remember) when you sought help of your Lord, and He answered you (saying): "I will help you with a thousand of the angels each behind the other (following one another) in succession. Allah made it only as glad tidings, and that your hearts be at rest therewith. And there is no victory except from Allah. Verily, Allah is All-Mighty, All-Wise. (8:9-10)

Sharh As-Sadr
Du'a of Prophet Musa (peace be upon him): (Musa, Moses) said: 'O my Lord! Open for me my chest (grant me self-confidence). And ease my task for me. And loose the knot (the defect) from my tongue ( i.e. remove the incorrectness from my speech). That they understand my speech. And appoint for me a helper from my family. Harun (Aaron), my brother. (20:25-30)


The italic excerpts from here

Guts, Instincts and Intuition

A well-known "unknown" cyber benggali celup (yang actually not benggali) and I were chatting this morning on facebook.

About trust.

Trusting your instincts. Especially in this virtual world. And in real life of course.

I find that my first instincts about a person are ALWAYS correct.

BUT, I often make the mistake of giving the benefit of the doubt to some to even when my first instinct/impression deep in my gut is " I don't really like this person", or "beware". Or "this person is not sincere". Don't let them in.

It usually turns out to be right.

By then, damage done. Caution thrown to wind.

Some people are just like that. I don't analyse a person every's move, word, intent like some perverted watchers I know who exist in the sidelines in this blogosphere. Kalah CIA. Atau Israeli intelligence.

I'm not that shrewd or cunning or clever at pretending to be what I'm not.

What you see is what you get. What I say is what I feel.

Unfortunately, not everyone is like that.

The world is full of pretense.

And insincerity.

Maybe I'm like that too to another. I don't know.

But I certainly do not play on others' miseries or misfortunes for my own benefit.

That much I know is true.

Instincts. Intuition and Guts

Morocco travelogue...

I went to Morocco with Jill and John...check it out...

What an absolutely beautiful country it is...

Thanks guys...(online pun ok la)

First you gotta dream...haha...laws of attraction...just like how my constant thoughts of Punjabi soul food last week, turned into reality last nite...when a lovely Punjabi Restaurant opened right at my doorstep yesterday, and I finally got eat aloo paratha, plain paratha, dhall turka, butter chicken, matter paneer, kashmiri pulao, raita and topped it off with gajjar halwa (carrot halwa with almonds)...50 bucks for four people..ok per...after an unsuccessful hunt for one in Setapak which was too dirty for my liking and the owner too oily-looking - which ended in my car whacking, deservedly, another car at the nightmarish Pekeliling roundabout. But in the end...I got the halwa like Mummy used to make. Who cares about a dent or five.



So Morocco, here I come...

Kids and Ramadhan...

I asked my kids to fold the clothes as I prepared food for iftar, washed the clothes and attempted a score of other tasks...the least they could do. After an hour, I peeked into the living room. Wondering why they weren't bickering over who folded what or who folded more...and found them passed out. Just like that.

Serious!



Sakit hati tapi nak tergelak lebih. Macam sepuluh hari tak makan. Tengoklah yang dalam bakul tu. Si Maryam, the youngest.

The inspiration behind U2's Vertigo ?

I was going to write something yesterday about supermarkets, vertigo and pantiliners after buka posa, which left some people wondering and leaving their own speculations...haha.

The world is so full of choices nowadays. Gone are the simple, carefree yesteryears, when you didn't have to worry and fret so much about anything. Much less pantiliners. We just had plain old sanitary napkins (what a demeaning term it is, eh? haha) for all our womenly troubles.

See, women are special. Their are like rainbows after a rainy day. When the sun comes out again. They decorate the clearing skies with a huge swash or colors. Even their bodily secretions are colorful. You have red, bright red, muddy red, brownish, brackish, yellowish, greenish, white, powdery, clear...hmmm...maybe even purple or blue? And smells...musky, earthy, dreamy, yucky, ewwwwy...etc etc etc. And they even taste different. Ok...I won't go into that. Leave that to the men and their tastebuds.

Popping into the supermarket is such an ordeal in itself this day and age. We have so many varieties of products that make your head spin. Eggs come in a dozen varieties. Grain-fed (I guess some are fed what? can't imagine), farmstyle, kampungstyle, townstyle, antibiotics-galore, antibiotic-free, enriched with omega 3s, omega 6s, selenium, and hey! I won't be surprised if they have one with uranium and we just bought it anyways because our eyes were smarting and seeing stars and our heads were already spinning (at least for the stress-induced vertigo sufferers like me) and so do oats (instant, quick cooking, slow cooking, regular cooking, old-style, new-style, no-style...gahhhh!). Veggies and fruits...organic, kampung, compost grown (ewww?), air grown, air flown, shipped, smuggled, pesticide-free, pesticide-ridden, etc etc... And fish. We have frozen (for years), defrosted, preserved as in formaldehyded, fresh, live, sea water, fresh water, murky waters, bla bla bla. Ditto for them cows and chickens. We have halal, non-halal, ayam katok, ayam kampung, ayam bandar, ayam pencen, ayam belum pencen, ayam dara, ayam dah tak dara, antibiotics -addled, growth hormone-pumped. Ditto meats. From India (always dubious to me like from China items...), from Australia (halal ka daging yang lembunya kena stun dulu sebelum sembelih), from Malaysia...all those different cuts and grades...Hoi! I just a one size fits all kinda cut, ok? I don't plan my menu a year in advance. Can't one cut fit all my different pots, pans and ovens and recipes? I just want them to be tender and not chewy and not have to spit out the beef and curse the pasaraya when I buka puasa, thus nullifying my already very tenuous fast.

Then we come to the toiletries. Not spared from the same trauma that makes the head spin (like when I'm drifting my Skyline GT-T...in my dreams...but that's an enjoyable kinda spin). Too many variations. I wanted to get some pantiliners yesterday. For my womanly needs. Plain and simple. And just walk out of the Giant supermarket and go home and prepare iftar for the kids. Instead, I ended up stuck at that aisle for over half an hour. I think it was the low blood sugar. Lowered my defences to the clever marketing ploys devised by these beneficiaries of women's bodily secretions. The choices were suddenly overwhelming.

Always Dri-Liners™ Pantiliners (and the others are always not so dri?)

• Dri-Weave™ — Helps keep moisture away for an everyday clean feeling (so we can wear it for more than a few days?)
  
• LeakGuard™ Core — Pulls fluid into the middle of the liner and helps lock away odors (sounds like a reactor core meltdown scenario designed radioactive leak guard)
  
• Unique Side Protection Zones — Uniquely designed to keep fluid from the sides and to help keep you protected every day(dri-weave, leakguard, side protection zones...hey! we just wanna keep dry and not have any gooey stuff running down our legs...all these trademarked terms sound like what Mercedes offers to the occupants of its cars, like a passenger crush protection zone...never knew we needed rocket science to deal with womenly issues (literally))
  
• Edge-to-Edge Adhesive — For great stay-put protection (of course we always want the liner to stay put...that's a non-issue, a given we ALWAYS want a liner to do just that...we do not want the liner to suddenly make its way out while we are waiting at the checkout line or at a buka puasa function and have people staring at the thing on the floor in our wake, kan?)
  

Always Thin Liners (and pantiliners are not? some people want bulky ones? might as well go get a pad then, kan?)

• Soft Cover — Gives you that comfortable feeling every day(some days we don't want comfort, I guess)
  
• Edge-to-Edge Adhesive — For great stay-put protection
• Individually Wrapped — So you can carry them discreetly(yeah, like we wave it it people's faces anyway everyday? I guess they have other types that are for the indiscreet ladies?)
  
• Flexibility — uniquely designed to move with you all day(yes, definitely, any woman wouldn't want to walk around with a plank between the legs)
  
• Thin Breathable Layer — Helps keep you dry( oh, I guess it could double as a mask in pandemic areas)
  

Always Flexi Style (and the others are ramrod straight so you have to walk kengkang, is it?)

• Our thinnest most flexible protection (yes, the the scales are already so cruel, don't add on anymore unwanted kilos on us women)
  
• Wrap around edges — Unique edges that fold under to fit multiple panty styles (for the thong groups...who right in their minds enjoy their butt cheeks being strangled daily wearing these thongs anyways...remember that "panty stuck in- between" feelings when we were kids...I don't wanna experience that at this age...I just want comfort...not hang myself or sun my butt in Rio for an all-over tan)
  
• Soft Top Layer — Designed for a comfortable feeling every day (who likes anything hard between their legs anyways...duhhh...oh, ok...maybe in other situations...but not when one wants to go to the office)
  

Then you have the Kotex brand:

They give us...

Unscented

Scented (ever smell bodysweat/underarm odor mingled with scents? like it helps?)

Odor Absorbing, Extra Coverage ( to absorb odor, just use baking powder, cheaper...I'm always amused by "extra coverage" ...does that mean it outdoes the Maxis and Celcom and can double as a mobile phone in emergencies?)

Extra Coverage, Protection Accrue (I though only interest accrued...didn't know it applied to bodily discharge too)

Ultra Thin Ultra Compact, Regular Unscented (anymore Ultra Thin and Ultra Compact and we would be buying air packaged as liners to gullible women)

Ultra Thin Ultra Compact with Wings, Regular Unscented (so they can fly? everyone/thing can fly, not only Tony Fernandes)

Wrapped, Long (why not just wrap them all individually...easier on everyone kan?)

Wrapped, Maximum Protection (for maximum protection, just get an adult diaper for heaven's sake lah...no much a liner can do for cases of severe incontinence...like women are gonna know just how the childbirth ravaged bladder muscles are going to embarass them today...ie: try having a sudden sneezing attack on a full bladder in a jam-packed LRT, standing, without time to flex those necessary muscles...men flex outwardly...show offs...women, on the other hand, are the masters of inward flexing)

The list went on. And on. There were other brands. Carefree (has so many degrees of dryness factored in...the brand name is a MISNOMER ie: for the carefree, couldn't care less woman) Sofy, Whisper, Kao, Stayfree, ete etc etc. each with at least 5 or more variations.

I couldn't for the life of me find "REGULAR". I just wanted a regular liner, OKAY???? That's all.

My head spun, and I picked something which I vaguely recognised...it had unscented, long, maximum, light, wrapped and God knows what else...but it also had the magic word. REGULAR. Plain old liner.

Thank God.

And then there was the checkout line. Long, long, long, lines. Crowds. People. More people. Suffocating types with 10 kids, granmas, granpas, uncles, aunties, god-fathers, god-mothers, mistresses etc etc. Malaysian-style. Every day is whole family day in the marts.

There was one line for cash, one for credit cards, one for MEPS, one for more than ten items, one for less than ten items, but NONE for stress-induced (even anxiety comes in a hundred different variations and labels nowadays) vertigo and claustrophobia sufferers who just needed to grab their needs, throw the money at the cashier and jump into the safe haven of their car and drive off sane and in one piece.

Here. U2's Vertigo. Take a listen. Any mention of pantiliners?

Saya...

nak tulih cerita sket pasal pasaraya dan vertigo dan pantiliner.

Dan connection between the three.

Nantilah.

Lepas bukak posa.

When you find you

Love this song. heard it for the first time on the radio today
Take a listen here...


(ade ke such a man in real life..haha)

Come Back to Me by David Cook

You say you gotta go and find yourself
You say that you're becoming someone else
Don't recognize the face in the mirror looking back at you
You say you're leaving as you look away
I know there's really nothing left to say
Just know I'm here whenever you need me, I will wait for you

So I'll let you go, I'll set you free
And when you've seen what you need to see
When you find you...come back to me

Take your time, I won't go anywhere
Picture you with the wind in your hair
I'll keep your things right where you left 'em, I'll be here for you.

Oh, and I'll let you go, I'll set you free
And when you've seen what you need to see
When you find you...come back to me

And I hope you find everything that you need
I'll be right here, waiting to see
You find you...come back to me

And I can't get close if you're not there
I can't get inside if there's no soul there
I can't fix you, I can't save you
It's something you'll have to do.

So I'll let you go, I'll set you free
And when you've seen what you need to see
When you find you...come back to me
Come back to me

So I'll let you go, I'll set you free
And when you've seen what you need to see
When you find you...come back to me

And I hope you find everything that you need.
I'll be right here, waiting to see.
You find you...come back to me

When you find you...come back to me
When you find you...come back to me
You find you...come back to me

When I was a little girl...

I wanted to be:

a stewardess (everybody wanted to be one then...why ah?)
a pilot (ditto)
cikgu
a lawyer (didn't know what that meant then)
a jurutera (ditto, just sounded impressive)
a car designer (ever since I could speak...hmmm...dunno how I came to know what this one was all about from age 5)
saya mahu jadi seorang doktor
saya mahu menjadi seorang doktor haiwan
work with the United Nations
a journalist
an international correspondent
a war correspondent (too much Newsweek, Time)
a writer...like Alistair McLean, Lawrence Sanders, Jeffrey Archer, James Clavell (his war books were okay..others mainly porno lah), James Michener, Danielle Steel was good at first, then became factory-mill standard...and who else,ah?...hmmm..momnesia strikes again....pre-1997 memories are a virtual blur.
a jet-setting hugely successful businesswoman
a Richard Branson
a Donald Trump
a Steven Jobs
a billionairelah!

Nowadays...
I still wannabe a Richard Branson
or a heart surgeon
or a brain surgeon
or a Jamie Oliver (hey, I cooked like him long before he ever learnt how to use the potty)
an Anthony Bourdain
a Nigella
a Bob Blumer...
their jobs look like fun!
one of those Lonely Planets hosts...apanama...oh! Robin Wright? (he sent a video of himself on the loo and got to be famous giler...hmmm...)
an environmental/peace/social activist
a Dr. Jamilah of Mercy Malaysia wannabe...
a stay-at-home mum
a work-from-home mum
a fulltime careerwoman part-time mum?...nah...not me...
a jetsetting glamorous socialite once-in-a-while mum? Nah...will bring the kids along on the jet...


sheesh.

I wannabe everything! Even at 40...(ok I cheated a little... at 41!!! )